Twilight: The Official Verdict.
Mar. 28th, 2009 01:09 amBasically:
- As funny when I'm sober as it is when I'm drunk.
- Without question, one of the worst movies ever made.
- A party favorite; the film itself has no intrinsic value, but the act of watching it with friends (MST3K-style) is seriously good for the soul, and I would do it again.
- Jasper's hair is going to kill someone if it doesn't get laid soon.
- Bella Swan's dad still reminds me of my dad, and I like him for that reason. He's pretty much the only character in the story that even vaguely approaches an honest portrayal of an actual human being.
- What the hell was up with that wolf-natives vs. vampire-ancestors flashback? There were like three different centuries worth of fashion going on there (jodhpurs, people... jodhpurs); and the natives were wearing painted wolf caps, yo. I mean, seriously. Sepia does not automatically make everything okay.
- Romantic conversation can only happen in a tree. Logistics; schmogistics.
- Cinematography = good; dialogue = bad. Delivery of said dialogue = super bad. (Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto.)
- Forks, WA is a real place... who knew?